[Matt79d]

So ive noticed a lot of posts asking about advice when it comes to girls.. Seems like most of these come from guys in HS, so I just wanted to throw some stuff out there that I have learned. I hope this helps some of you..

So let me start off with the main point behind this post.. In HS, enjoy yourself. HS is a time where you have little to no responsibility outside of school, and things are much more simple. Enjoy hanging out with your buddies, enjoy the girls, and dont take things to seriously.

When you start dating your first girlfriend or two, its easy to fall head over heels for them. Its an emotion that you are not used to, and it feels great. Truthfully, this probably wont last. Enjoy and learn from the experience. My first HS gf came when I was 15. I thought we would be together forever LOL, that lasted a year, and havent heard from here since.

I guess the easiest way to sum this up, is that who you are in HS is probably not who you will be in the years after. When you graduate, life will take you and everyone you know in different directions, and lead to new experiences. Things that mattered or didnt matter in HS will change. You will find new passions and meet new people, and its hard to be with someone who you feel like your growing apart from whether it be distance, physical, mentally, etc.

I dated a girl from age 16-22. Fell in love, and still in love. Not sure if im in love with who we were at one point, in love with her, in love with the idea of being in love with here, idk. She is on the east coast going to school growing as a person and I am trying to do the same out here. Everything I said above can be demonstrated through this relationship. When we were in HS, the biggest decision in life was what movie we were going to watch. We graduated and attended schools within the same area. Then you run into situations like money, new passions that the other person does not share, status of you relationship and where it leads, maturity, new friends, etc. All I can say guys is, enjoy your experiences while they last and if/when things end, be thankful for them, and then on to the next one.

I was going to get into the dreadful "Twenty One".. The age most girls want to "explore" who they are (which is great if your a single guy looking to get laid, but terrible if your in a long term relationship). But this was already long enough, and im sure someone else can hit on this if they want.

Joe seems to be the man when it comes to advice, so I cant wait to see what he has to add.

 

[Matt79d]

HAHA, I see it.

 

[Matt79d]

This is

Dude hell yeah OP great advice. Fell head over heels for a girl my freshman year in high-school, the last few months of high school we finally started dating. It's been 8 months now. I really hope it continues to go strong. But yeah now all of those real life situations are starting to happen. Like money, and careers. Blah

Hang in there man.. This is where all the WORK starts. Remember all the stuff about relationships that you have heard, but never really applied? Communication, Trust, ability to grow, etc. This is now key. Learn to communicate, even if you two are alright in this area, there is always room to grow. Trust is going to be key. Whether its work or school, you will both start to meet new people, and yes, some of these new people will probably be guys. You will both start to have new interests and passions, even if hers suck(and they very well may) you still have to act interested cause its a big deal to her.

AND if stuff doesnt work out, dont worry. Your young, and some of the best times are still ahead of you. You never stop meeting new people, possibilities are all around.

 

[Matt79d]

What about us young HS guys chasing guys? Does the same advice apply?

I would assume so.. All of what I said was mostly typical advice, nothing gender specific.

 

[Matt79d]

I was joking, but I like that you responded seriously and helpfully.
Cool points for you

I dont hate man, to each its own.. Straight/Gay/Bi/Trans what the fuck ever, doesnt effect my lifestyle.

 

[Matt79d]

haha hell yeah. I mean honestly.. So many people make such a big deal about it.. I dont have gay dudes coming door to door to my house "hi, can I have 2 minutes of your time to talk to you about the benefits of being gay?" lol, you know what I mean?
But whatever, off topic..

 

[Matt79d]

College is ten times better than high school. In high school 90% of dudes will fall hard over a chick. I just graduated from high school in June so I have recent experiences with chicks in high school. College presents many more options. And a little advice that I learned, do not get in a relationship. You are young so have fun. You shouldn't limit yourself at this young of age. ESPECIALLY in college.

Umm, against my better judgment.. I totally agree lol.

I mean if your in HS and in a relationship that you think is worth staying in, go for it. There is no reason this wont work out, it will be tough, but hey, life can be tough..

BUT.. If your heading into college single, dont worry about it, so many new experiences are heading your way.

 

[Matt79d]

how long did that take?

Haha true.

Some great advice in here... BUT "treat her like everyone else" , "wait till they find you" .... At some point you all have to go for it. If you have strong feeling for someone, you cant just treat them like everyone else, or you will never stand out. And hell yeah, waiting for someone to find you, that sounds amazing.. That takes all of the hard work out of it.. But how long and how often does that happen? What I ment by starting this thread was just to say.. If any of you HS guy out there are having lady problems, dont worry, it gets better. That doesnt mean dont try! If you like someone, go for it.

 

[Matt79d]

finished H.S yesterday btw guys

Finished school in the middle of Oct? Hmm weird.
Congrats though!

 

[Matt79d]

Honestly guys don't even bother dating in high school, or at least keep it very casual. Once you get to college, it's like girls transformed into women over one summer. Girls change a lot, hell everyone does, in high school. You could fall head over heels for someone one year and the next year they're not even that same person anymore.

My advice: as great as long term relationships are, try not to get too wrapped up in them in high school because there is a much higher risk of setting yourself up for heartbreak.

And no matter what, no matter how amazing she is, no matter how much you love her, do NOT make your life about her. Have your own life outside of her, your own friends, your own personality, or if you don't it will destroy you if she breaks your heart.

BAM! You can close the thread now. Great advice Dropout.

 

[Matt79d]

No I was referring to that they literally transform in goddesses over a couple of months, you will be amazed how many gorgeous girls you are seeing in one place.

Umm Yeah! Im from San Diego where there are gorgeous girls everywhere.. I just moved to Arizona, near ASU, and I cannot believe how many beautiful girls are out here.. I mean everywhere you look!

 

[Matt79d]

I guess all the hype about ASU is true then hahaha  *applies to ASU ASAP*

Honestly, its amazing. EVERYWHERE you look. It seems like AZ is the only place where bikini tops are allowed as shirts lol. I mean when its 115, people dont wear much

 

[Matt79d]

Really? I went to ASU for a year and was very unimpressed with the attractiveness of the girls. And I'm from Michigan.

Hmm idk.. I mean I see beautiful girls everywhere I turn. When I get bored I just go to Target and Wal mart and walk around just to see the women

But yes, there are a lot of fake boobs/tans.. And there are a lot of meat heads here.. But oh well, im not really into the party/drug scene, so I stay away from them.

 

[Matt79d]

Update?

dang, this got dug up out of nowhere lol. well dang where do I start? I guess a little after this thread I went on vacationback to CA and hung out with some friends.. one of which was a girl from middle/high school. we used to flirt back in photo and yearbook and have always been attracted to each other but one of us was always dating someone else. well the night went well, we started talking long distance and after 3-4 months she said she wanted to move out to AZ. I didn't want her to regret her decision and maybe got a little scared so I broke up with her.

this is where my old relationship played a big role. soon after we broke up, I knew I did the wrong thing.. she was amazing! she could put up with my dirty humor, my taste of music, my parents.. lol. She was the complete opposite of my ex- high school sweetheart. so with a lot of flowers and begging, she took me back and moved out to AZ. I knew she was the one and a few months later we were engaged and then got married in July!

so basically, my long relationship from HS help me see how amazing my current wife is! I was able to learn from that relationship and realize when I found "the one"'. I do still think about my ex but just the typical "how is she doing"  type of thing. I'm 26, had the HS sweetheart, did the single thing at a party school, then met the love of my life.. I can't say I'm a genius but if u have any questions I will try and answer..

 

[Matt79d]

Umm not so much Christmas.. But I did see the girls all trying to find someone for vday and prom.. But you seem to know, they just dont want to feel left out. I never paid much attention to them because it wasnt genuine.. I used that time to go after the girls I wanted to!

 

[Matt79d]

congrats

Thanks