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Now, once upon a time not long ago
There was a little rapper about to blow
But his album came, and it had only one hit
and then he got dropped and was marked for def
So these silly little fans, they were misled
By a simpy internet podcast hip-hop simp
"Me and you, VH1, we're gonna make some cash
Give Tahiry this wedding ring, let her roast my ass"
Hey mister, would you care to bear witness to
The ass-whippin I'm about to administer
To this ass-kissin little vaginal blister?
Simp Budden: little Marshall Mathers' sister
And in this corner, we have the "Mr
Pump Pump it Up," it's the Mad, sinister
Dr. Evil, with his bag of tricks for
This little antagonistic
Dick-sucking ex-Drizzy Drake fan from Jersey
I'm 'bout to murder little Joey-***-Stimpy
You bastard, I ain't wanna have to diss ya
Mr. Simp , where the fuck you at? I miss ya!

Mr. Simp, oh, Mr. Simp
Wherefore art thou, Mr. Simp?
Please tell me what happened with
That style that you were began' with

Mr. Simp, oh, Mr. Simp
Are you from Los Angeles
New York, or just a janitor
From New Jersey? Oh, Mr. Simp

Now, at first, I ain't really understand this shit
Picture me, for a second, and imagine it:
Chillin' in the Twittersphere relaxin'
When all a sudden some bullshit comes across my scanners, it's
Mr. Simp, on some desperate shit
It creeped me out at first; man, this is sick
But me, bein' just as sick, this conflict
Gets my dick harder than arithmetic
And I know how you jealous ones envy
Drake shoulda knew better from the first few letters you sent him
The first two letters, you were tellin' him shit like
You respect him, like any other regular MC
The third letter, you asked how come he ain't return
None of the messages at OVO you left him?
The fourth letter: "Drake you're really startin' to upset me"
The fifth letter told me you were comin' to get him
The sixth letter, there's a bomb threat on their building
This crazy motherfucker's really tryin' to kill him
So I went back and read the first few letters that said
Some shit about a message you left
Oh shit! That's not a E, that's an A!
This dude wants to leave him a 'massage,' he's gay!
Right away, I'm on the phone with The Game:
"We got a bogey," "Yo Spingebill, I'm on the way"

Mr. Simp, oh, Mr. Simp
Wherefore art thou, Mr. Simp?
Please tell me what happened with
That style that you were began' with

Mr. Simp, oh, Mr. Simp
Are you from Los Angeles
New York, or just a janitor
From New Jersey? Oh, Mr. Simp

So, in two seconds flat, Game's at my crib
Only thing is, we both know where this kid lives
And New Jersey is a fucking 3 day trip
"Shit. Oh Game , wait a minute, that's it!
All we gotta do is use a bit of turbo-boost
We can fly over the states!" "Let's Go!" [whoosh]
[So we're off to Jersey and we're gainin' speed impact, grunt]
"What was that? Oh, 50 Cent
Fuck it," Keep goin', no time to waste
"Wait, back up. Hit him one more time, in case
"Okay," Fuck, now he's draggin' under the car
Oh well, Only thirty more thousand miles!"
Meanwhile, me and Game are tryin' to conversate
Just tryin' to find a reason for the constant hate
And tryin' to figure out what happened to 'Curtis the Rat'
"He couldn't have fell off that hard." Ain't no way!
What happened to the way you was rappin' when you was scandalous?
That Joe Budden turned into a Love evangelist!
Plus, he raps with his regular voice [four impacts]
"What was that?" "New Boyz."
So, we pull up to the bridge where he last was spotted
His corpse was still movin', but his ass was rotted
And he kinda smelled a little like Courtney Love
I figured if I stick him with a fork, he's done
So I stabbed him twice. Kept jabbin', Christ!
He won't die! This guy's like a battered wife!
He's like Ja: he keeps comin' back for more
But he won't fight back. I cracked his jaw
Hold up! 'Joe, quit foldin' up!
Punch me in the chest, make my shoulders touch
Do something! At least one punchline!
Come on! Till the meter reads Nine! Nine! Nine-
Ty nine percent of my fans are blond!
'Joe, come on, answer me, man, respond!
Tell me 'bout you losing love!
Those fucking metaphors from like Em!
Raw to the floor, raw like Reservoir Dogs!
Bite another line from Redman's song!
Suddenly, the stub of a dead man's arm
From a midget reaches out from under the car
It's 50! This motherfucker won't die, neither!
Game starts sprayin' him with cans of ether
We swamped the bitch in it; stomped the bitch again
"Compton!" "KTT, bitch, talk some shit again!
Stomp him!" "Switch feet!" "Stomp him!" "Switch again!"
"Game, all right, he's dead, dog, quit kickin' him!
I think Simp Budden jumped off the bridge again!" ("Ahh!")
"Damn," "He disappeared, yo, he's gone, he did it again!"

Mr. Simp, oh, Mr. Simp
Wherefore art thou, Mr. Simp?
Please tell me what happened with
That style that you were began' with

Mr. Simp, oh, Mr. Simp
Are you from Los Angeles
New York, or just a janitor
From New Jersey? Oh, Mr. Simp
 

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spingebill said:
Suddenly, the stub of a dead man's arm
From a midget reaches out from under the car
It's 50! This motherfucker won't die, neither!
Game starts sprayin' him with cans of ether
We swamped the bitch in it; stomped the bitch again
"Compton!" "KTT, bitch, talk some shit again!
Stomp him!" "Switch feet!" "Stomp him!" "Switch again!"
:dead: wtf mane wtf
 
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