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The Fear by CHASING STARS (me)
(feedback would be cool)

my hearts filled with fear, and this is what it sounds like
i'll take you on a journey of my life through sound bytes
cuz i just lived last night like it was my last night
didn't think i'd make it here so now i'm livin in hindsight
so i'm sittin on my roof and i contemplate my past
i dont think about it too long, i dont want it comin back
and when you worry 'bout tomorrow you forget about today
so i stand up for my speech without knowin what to say
but i'm hearin what they say so i have faith in my heart
but it's hard to keep the faith when everything just falls apart
thats why i started writing, just to medicate myself
but it only works for so long, then i'm left with nothing else
and i try to speak my mind, i'm sick of cryin' in the phone
i'm done with crowded rooms where i still feel the most alone
now its all i've known, that and nightmares of the past
and nightmares of the future, i try to keep myself intact

and the people all around me, if only they could understand
that me askin for help makes me feel less like a man
and this wasn't the plan for it to be this way
but hindsight's 20/20 i can see it all today
my success is 50/50 i'll never make it all the way
and when your life reads like a book you try to put that book away
but i think i'll be okay if i just get what i need
Him, her, sunshine; a bandage for when i bleed
and last night i had a dream where the waters recede
and i'm just standin on the shore, that's when the waves begin to plead
so i'm walkin towards the water without knowin where i'm goin
it's symbolic of my life, i try to keep my pain from showin
its like i'm backed up to the goal line and the other team hates me
i'm callin out the play; just avoidin' the safety
and now i'm callin on God just to bring me some safety
bring me some safety, i'm beggin for safety

so all the while i'm here i'm just graspin for some sanity
and i'm losing grasp on every single thing He's handed me
and right about now is when i wish i had a plan B
but it's all up in the air and i'm just left down here standing
and i can only make it so long when i'm clouded with uncertainty
i got nothin but stress; my future's hidin' itself purposely
and everyone around me thinks they're helpin by just hurtin me
and then they criticize every single thing i've learned to be
it's not that i'm unhappy, i've just lost my sense of joy
so i'm layin on my bed and my depression gets deployed
so i'm reachin for my notebook just to get some relief
and then i'm reachin for the sleeping pills just to get some sleep
and i feel like i'm in hell, but i'm still right here
my mind's caving in and i'm feelin like last year
i'm sittin on my bed, prayin for the last tear
my minds going blind. i'm staring down The Fear
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