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I've been having a rough few months man. College has been hard to adjust to tbh. I have very low self esteem and have struggled with depression since I was 13. I am happy to say I have a few good friends in college, but things are not going well. I am skipping classes constantly because of my complete lack of motivation. What was once a side thing in 10th grade and become a bigger presence in 11th and 12th grade and pretty much a full blown addiction at this point for me is xanax. I take at least 1-2 bars a day. Haven't not been xanned out for awhile. Also I know many people will want to debate this, but I am also addicted to weed. I've tried quitting and it's very hard. In order to sustain my drug problems this semester I stole a lot of money from my parents and they found out... I've been looking like crazy to try and find a job to support my habits and pay my parents back the money I took.

Believe me I tried quitting xanax. I went cold turkey and I felt I was going to die. I know damn well my parents can barely afford college and they definetely can't afford fucking rehab so that's out of the question... to say the least I'm stressed, irritable, and just scared about my future.

But the end of Ultra Light beam and the general theme of it just got me so emotional man. No matter how fucked up I am and how low I get, God will always love me. It's something I've been taught since I was a kid but am just thinking about now. I said a quick prayer after the song ended and I felt an amount of relief I haven't felt in ages... sadly I can't listen to the album because my roommate is with his gf anyway enjoy guys love you all

:rejoice:
 
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